Submitted by megan on Fri, 10/13/2006 - 23:01
What was this week? What is wrong with me? Is it the change in the weather? Is it that I am neither feeling well nor actually getting sick, but having little bits stuffy nose and scratchy throat but no real sick? Is it because I have been training people and that is something I am not very good at? And because I do not like to do things I am not very good at? Is it because it is cold out and my tweed coat needs to be fixed and my tweed hat is still in Halifax, even though the nice lady at Enterprise said she would mail it to me over a week ago? Is it because I am gaining weight and it feels like somebody has attached a prosthetic belly to my real belly? Is it because I am starting a new relationship and that is sometimes a very scary proposition for anyone, never mind for someone who just got out of an old relationship that was very sad, and then very mad, and only one season ago?
No matter. I am feeling weird and I do not like it.
I turned to Shelley just before yoga started and said, apropos of nothing, "There isn't enough time."
"Of course not," she replied. "There never has been."
True, that. But I don't know what to do about it. Do I do less stuff? I enjoy my stuff. I enjoy yoga and running and visiting with my friends and writing and going on dates with the Great Dater. And cooking real food. And going to shows. It all takes time. Of which there has never been enough. I know.
It's 11 pm and my first load of laundry for the week just finished spinning. I am going to go hang it up and crawl into bed early. When I wake up, hopefully someone will have put a prosthetic brain on my real brain.