Where You Keep Your Pain
So I've been re-reading Anal Pleasure & Health by Jack Morin. It's been quite a while since I last perused it, and while I remembered it being chock-a-block with great information, I'd forgotten how unintentionally funny it is.
He recommends, among other things, keeping an ass journal.
Of course, that this makes me giggle is part of the reason people get fucked up about ass play in the first place. There's no good reason that an ass journal is more inherently hilarious than a food diary. But it is, and there you go.
No ass journal for me.
What a great book though. If you're interested in anal play and shying away because of whatever, this book will go a long way towards getting you over that whatever. Compared to other books on the market, his writing is rather formal and professorial, but in the main, he just comes across like such a nice, kind, smart man.
This post, however, is not actually either about that book or ass fucking.
In one of the sections, one I scanned Friday night, he talks about the fact that many people keep their chronic tension in their ass. So I'm reading along, I've been doing some of the exercises anyway, I take a moment and communicate with my anus.
-Hi anus, you tense?
-No ma'am, we're loose as a goose down here.
Sad that I don't have an ass journal, no?
Now then, since I'm pretty sure I'm not stress free, if I'm not keeping my tension in my ass, where might it currently reside? I do a scan of typical places: shoulders, neck, jaw. Aha. Right. My brain scan is telling me it's knotted and tight, my fingers pressing the back of my ear and my along my jawline confirm this fact.
When you discover that your ass is tight, Morin writes, first you just acknowledge that it's tight. You accept it. Many people will find that once they've noticed and accepted, they'll start actually hurting, because they're finally feeling what the muscles are holding. This is the first step.
My god, those poor people.
If my ass hurt as much as my jaw does right now, I'd be frantic. Crawling the walls, in the emergency room, frantic. It fucking kills: the pain is in my throat; it's crawling tendrils up between my skull and scalp; it's a burning star 1 cm in from the corner of my right mandible, the rays shooting up and across the back of my ear.
Could maybe be something else, but my glands aren't really swollen and I don't have the brain fog that comes with a migraine. And it started about 12 hours after I read that passage and completed step one.
What does my body want to do with all this pain? Well, you guessed it. It wants to truss my jaw up tighter than Christmas fowl. I have muttered the word "relax" to myself more times in the past 2 days than I have in the past 2 years combined.
Let's hope the second step starts soon.
